29 days till...

So, I have yet to be reprimanded for my lack of comment on my relationship status, but I feel that today was worth an update. We (Jess my fiance and myself) have become one step closer to being able to fill out the "married" box on our tax forms. As a matter of fact, this one step has put us under the 30 day mark. I may not be able to express just how excited I am over this, but I will try:

Almost 9 years of longing to find in the past year exactly what I was longing for. At first I thought that I longed for Jess herself, and later I thought I longed for the relationship. These longings then made me long for simple acceptance. Where I am now, though, is that I am longing for an opportunity. Now, I realize there are many opportunities that I have seized and many others that have been generously given. This is one that has been given. I have been given the opportunity to have an earthly relationship that allows me to mimic the romantic relationship I am coming to know with God. A chance to show that even when I'm hurt I have someone to trust and go to. Someone that can love me with blunt honesty and soothing words. A person that God has placed in my life that I can pour out my love from Him to her.

I'll stop there and go ahead and state that I do not believe Jess to be God incarnate or the second coming. Yet I do believe her to be as every other person, a tarnished reflection of who God is. As C.S. Lewis states in "The Weight of Glory" it is not the things here on this earth that bring us happiness and joy; instead, the things we enjoy point us, guide us, and even reflect the light as a shiny-dangly thing to the Source of Goodness.

Jess, thank you. Thank you for being that reminder of God's goodness in my life. In the plans we make for our family you have reminded me of the goodness I experienced growing up. In our discussions of jobs and work you remind me of the gifts God has placed in me. In the times you get onto me for not doing all I could you remind me there is a higher purpose designed for me. For every time you say "I love you" you show me that there is a source of Love, one that has filled you up so much that you choose to share it with me.

In return, let me be that same shiny-dangly thing reflecting the light when I say, I love you.

Yes, I realize this is in a public domain as well. With that in mind, remember that there is a source of Goodness. Not just niceties and warm-fuzzy feelings, but a source of Truth and Love. With the love of Christ Jesus, the Father, and the Holy Spirit...I Love you, too.